I will do everything in my power to be at every single one of these.

Noteworthy upcoming shows:

TONIGHT: Streetlight Manifesto @ Northern Lights, 7:30pm

Tomorrow: Resistance '77 and Bulldog Courage @ Valentines, 8 pm

Friday: Bane @ Valentines, 7pm

October 2nd: Ghostface Killah @ Northern Lights, 7 pm

October 8th: AFI and Gallows @ Northern Lights, 7:30 pm

October 11th: 3 Inches Of Blood @ Northern Lights, 7:30

October 13th: SOCIAL DISTORTION @ Northern Lights, 8pm

October 24th: Type O Negative @ Northern Lights, 8:30

October 25th: DETHKLOK AND MASTODON @ Washington Avenue Armory, 6pm

November 10th: Hatebreed and Cannibal Corpse @ Northern Lights, 6:30pm

November 21st: MC Chris @ Valentines, 7 pm

December 2nd: Underoath @ Northern Lights, 8pm

Holy fucking shit, this fall is a fantastic concert season. This entry might be a running update as I find more.
  • Current Mood
    excited excited

I asked your name, you asked the time.

Blah. Life is weird. Absent passion and messages from people I thought were long gone. That's really all the detail I want to go into right now.

"I picked you out of a crowd and talked to you,
I said I liked your shoes,
you said, "Thanks, can I follow you?",
so it's up the stairs and out of view,
no prying eyes,
I poured some wine,
I asked your name, you asked the time,

now it's two o'clock,
the club is closed,
we're up the block,
your hands on me, pressing hard against your jeans,
your tongue in my mouth, trying to keep the words from coming out,
you didn't care to know who else may have been you before,

I want a lover I don't have to love,
I want a girl who's too sad to give a fuck,
where's the kid with the chemicals,
I thought he said to meet him here but I'm not sure,
I've got the money if you've got the time,
you said it feels good,
I said, "I'll give it a try",

then my mind went dark,
we both forgot where your car was parked,
let's just take the train,
I'll meet up with the band in the morning,

bad actors with bad habits,
some sad singers they just play tragic,
and the phone's ringing and the van's leaving,
let's just keep touching,
let's just keep, keep singing,

I want a lover I don't have to love,
I want a boy who's so drunk he doesn't talk,
where's the kid with the chemicals,
I've got a hunger and I can't seem to get full,
I need some meaning I can memorize,
the kind I have always seems to slip my mind,

but you, but you,
you write such pretty words,
but life's no story book,
love's an excuse to get hurt,
and to hurt,
do you like to hurt,
I do, I do,

then hurt me,
then hurt me."
  • Current Mood
    melancholy melancholy

"Oh I've made love, yeah I've been fucked, so what?"

I've never felt as lonely as I do on the streets of my city at 3am; empty condom wrapper in my pocket, stomach full of booze and pills, absently tagging the windows of stores, coffee shops and banks, while walking with my head down analyzing cracks in the sidewalk.

Some gems I left around my neighborhood:

'Is this all there is?'

'Your beauty will betray you.'

'Love is dead.'

'Time is up.'

'Your heart has passed its expiration date. This is life as we know it.'

'Your god has gone and left you.'

I guess one might say I'm slightly discontent with the world at this point in my life.

PS: Why are anti-materialist girls so hard to find?

Vanity is a turn-off. Realize it.
  • Current Music
    Bright Eyes - "Hot Knives"


Last night I celebrated the prompt breaking of my no more one night stands rule by getting hit by a car. Awesome.

Sides bruised up pretty good, not to mention the big gash on my forehead. Not having health insurance is like an adventure.

The dickhead drove off immediately, so I guess there's no big settlement check to look forward to either.

Life sucks.
  • Current Mood
    sore sore

"You're like a saint's song to me..."

A few updates.

I'm in my new apartment. It's great. SO much better than my old piece of shit. It's in a cool downtown area that's walking distance from a lot of things. My new landlord is gorgeous, and my new neighbors are really cool. I like it a lot and am so much happier here.

So, I have an epiphany of sorts the other night. To make a long story short it's Saturday night and I'm at a bar I'd never been to before post-show at Valentines. I repeated something I did a few weeks ago with a different couple, which was hooking up w/ a girl who apparently had a boyfriend in attendance. Unlike the dude from a few weeks ago who was content with just shooting death stares from across the room at me, this dude wanted to throw hands. A few shoves were exchanged, followed by a few fists before we both get grabbed by bouncers and are tossed out on the sidewalk. He tried to continue the fight, but the bouncers kept us apart and forced us to leave.

The epiphany I mentioned is as follows: I'm sick of one night stands. After that one, and 2 other ones I can think of over the past few months that haven't ended well (both long stories, hit me up on AIM), I've decided they aren't worth the drama. The sex is usually mediocre anyway, so what's the point? I'm tired of spending time with girls I don't actually like; buying drinks for some moron with a nice body. It's just too tiresome.

I intend to keep the regular booty calls I do have, because let's face it: I'm a sexual being and can't go full on sexless. The difference is that my regulars are girls that I actually know, and are people I enjoy spending time with, at least on a semi-regular basis. Generally speaking, my new rule of thumb from now on is going to be no more sleeping with people I wouldn't want to hang out with in a non-sexual situation.

If I meet a girl at the bar who's interesting and funny and who I enjoy just having a conversation with, then that's great. But if she totally sucks and her only redeeming quality is her physical attractiveness (seemingly the vast majority of the girls I sleep with), then I'm no longer to put up w/ her just to go home w/ her. I need to make myself walk away, because it's not worth it to me. Not anymore at least.

Well, that's all on that topic for now I suppose. I really don't know what else to say.

PS: I apologize if this entry seemed slightly harsh on females. I don't mean to imply that all women are stupid and have crappy personalities, I'm just saying that seems to be a general trend for women I've met lately, with a few exceptions (you know who you are).
  • Current Music
    Jolie Holland - "Mexican Blue"

(no subject)

And still this emptiness persists,
perhaps this is as good as it gets,
when you’ve given up the drink and those nasty cigarettes,
now I leave the party early, at least with no regrets,
I watch the sun as it comes up, I watch it as it sets,
yeah this is as good as it gets,

my my my it’s a beautiful world,
I like sleeping with Marie,
she is one sexy girl, full of mystery,
she says she doesn’t love me but she likes my company,
for now that’s good enough for me.
  • Current Music
    Colin Hay - "Beautiful World"

When you're right, you're right.

What's the best part of hooking up w/ cute scenester girls at a weirdo hipster shindig? Her apparent hipsterdouche boyfriend shooting daggers at me from across the room in his Dear Hunter shirt as her and I exit the bathroom together, her w/ a handful of my ass. Priceless.

Sorry dude, thanks for playing. We have some lovely parting gifts for you. Next time try not to suck so much.

Another fun story: A few nights ago I had an actual cliche situation happen to me. Had a girl from the bar over. The next morning she asks me to hand her her panties. I ended up handing her a pair that wasn't hers haha.

She takes them without looking, then yells 'EW!' and drops them. Afterwards she called me a slut. :shrug: I didn't argue.

She didn't think it was as funny as I did.

(no subject)

Fucking sweet weekend that spilled into Monday and today.

Saturday was chilling out with Nicole, Will and Rachel at the UAlbany fountain. Drinking 40's. Dennys. Dick pictures. Lots of sex jokes. Then afterwards Iffy's with Will til the wee hours.

Sunday Elyse randomly showed up in town, which fucking ruled cause I hadn't seen her in a solid 2 years. We grabbed Nicole (Lawton, not Petrie from Saturday) whom I also haven't seen in forever and this dude whatshisface and hit up an old school ice cream parlor. Good times.

Late Sunday night Ahna shows up, stays through very early this morning. Much booze. Bands at Valentines. Iffy's as always. An important mathematical equation for you all to keep in mind:

Beer + Adderall + Bad Brains + anal sex = good times. The bloody scratch marks on my back makes it look like I was mauled by a bear.

Now to go get my car's brakes fixed.

PS: What do you get when you mix a gay guy, a black guy and an eskimo? A snow-blower that doesn't work. BOOSH!
  • Current Music
    Every Time I Die - "Tusk And Temper"